WEATHER IN LINCOLN COUNTY


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Masked bandits nabbed inside a Bayfront Art Gallery

racoon burglars

(The information on this story seemed a little shaky to us – but we ran it anyway)

Newport Police got a call late in the evening that there were four “well-armed,” masked bandits pilfering artistic treasures in an art gallery at 818 SW Bay Boulevard. A passerby, looking into the Inscapes gallery window, saw four thugs inside going through the place looking for valuable art to fence on the international art underground.

But Newport Police ruined their plans of instant riches and retirement in Tahiti. They confronted the four and soon had them in pawcuffs enroute to the Lincoln County Jail on charges of breaking and entering and identity theft – pretending to be raccoons.

Due to the magnitude, if not the audacity of their crime, all four were denied bail. They watched their jail cell door slam shut – with a loud boom. “That’ll teach those two bit crooks they can’t get by with THAT in Lincoln County,” the jailer bellowed as he walked away.

Noting that officers had failed to order the four out of their raccoon halloween costumes, all four Slovakian gypsy midgets made a bee-line for a heating vent, ripped it off, scurried up the pipe to the roof and then slid down a tree on the Olive Street side to freedom.

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